SPN FIC LINK: Skin Walker - Sam/Sarah, Het, NC17

[maygra]

Skin Walker
by Maygra

Coda to eighth-horizon's Disinterment from the Salvation AU.

(Full index can be found http://wordsmiths.net/Maygra/fa_index.html - linked with permission.)

Sam/Sarah, Het, Rated NC17 , takes place after Breakage

(3,540 words)

Comments, edits and critiques welcomed.

The problem was, wishing a thing didn't make it come true.

+++++

Comments

[amalthia]

I really enjoyed this story, I really love how your Sam and Sarah and how you write.

[amalthia]

Um I mean I loved how you Sam and Sarah are in the story. I hate that you can't edit comments.

[maygra.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much, hon. I'm glad they come across so well for you!

[sanj.livejournal.com]

Ow ow ow ow ow beautiful.

[maygra.livejournal.com]

Thank you, sweetie! I'm a little hard on Sam sometimes.

[girlguidejones.livejournal.com]

This is a fascinating take on Sam and Dean's relationship. I'd love to see the Dean POV on these same events someday.

[girlguidejones.livejournal.com]

And of course, I fully recognize that this is me making your Sam/Sarah (which is lovely and which I adore both in you and eighth-horizon's stories) into something else which you may not intend it to be. I guess I'm always interested in the relationship between the two, regardless of how it is written.

[geminigrl11.livejournal.com]

I feel so incredibly greedy and selfish right now because I need MORE of this. Something more between Dean and Sam and I know they wouldn't talk about it - couldn't, not really - and yet Sam is still in so much pain, still MISSING a part of himself and trying to pull it back together and not quite managing . . .*flails* You and Barb separately are bad enough but the ideas you create together SLAY me and so it really isn't my fault, is it? The wanting more? Which doesn't mean you have to give it to me, but if you did my heart would grow three sizes . . . :)

"Every time he came close to losing Dean made it worse, made the uncontained scream of everything Sam was blot out and obscure any sense of reason or God help him, sense of self in an uncontrolled and unbearable void of loss that would not be ignored or wrestled into sanity or rationality. It felt like all the bits and pieces of him that had been cobbled and stitched together over the years to patch up the losses and the anger and the fears and the hopes and even the joys were being peeled back and pulled apart." Oh, Sam . . . :(

"But if Dean was half of everything he kept hidden then Sarah was half of everything he was that the world saw. Separate but vital like heart and soul, like skin and bones." Quite possibly the best Salvation AU lines ever, and definitely the ones that can sum this whole 'verse up, nothing more required.

[maygra.livejournal.com]

(sorry. Comment got cut off)

you and me both, sweetie. Barb has made me absolutely ravenous about wanting to know what this thing is and how it works and why and how it mirrors them. Because it really does.

And Dean, for the first time was actually awake and aware when Sam slipped inside -- which hasn't happened before (Not in Woven and not in Finally Gets home. Both time he as kind of elsewhere and Sam slipped into call him back.)

This time he was aware and he's learned some things he didn't know. Things about Sam that he though he understood and really didn't.

but they see this thing very differently. Sam thinks Dean accepts this because it's Sam and that feels like a betrayal of Dean's trust. But Dean's coming to realize that Sam's got some pretty big gaps and missing pieces in him from guilt and loss and a bunch of things...hollow places only Dean can fill and keep Sam from collapsing in on himself.

But we're still working on the details.

[mel-b-angel.livejournal.com]

But we're still working on the details.

Well, aint that a comforting thought? :) Like many before me, I love every little new bit, every new insight, each new turn of events in this 'verse, so to hear theres more on the drawing board, well, thats very nice to hear indeed.

This was wonderful and complex and felt really real. Thanks for this!

[geminigrl11.livejournal.com]

"Sam thinks Dean accepts this because it's Sam and that feels like a betrayal of Dean's trust. But Dean's coming to realize that Sam's got some pretty big gaps and missing pieces in him from guilt and loss and a bunch of things...hollow places only Dean can fill and keep Sam from collapsing in on himself." Oh, that's exactly it. And so beautifully put. Am so glad you are discussing details . . . however long it takes, it will be worth it. :)

[miriad.livejournal.com]

I enjoy how messy this is. There is no neat and tidy answer to their problems. They killed the thing that was coming after them but they didn't get rid of it and it only opened up more issues on it's way out the door. There is so much here that can't be fixed and sometimes I wonder if it could even be dealt with, if there is a solution to any of this.

Messy is awesome because it reflects real life and how real people are to each other. That reality gives your stories weight, a depth that makes them truly great writing, that takes these stories beyond the average fannish pursuit.

I'm sad for Sam right now and how apart he feels. That seems such a simple thing to say but it will change so much. This whole thing will change the dynamics of this whole family and it breaks me, a little bit, because you've set them up to be such a real and beautiful unit and to change that hurts me.

I get way too attached to fictional characters and I know it. But this, I loved this. I'm hoping for more but thankful for what I've received. Thanks so much.

[pushingyouaway.livejournal.com]

oh...oh my. ouchies.

poor sam. lost, broken, and confused. but he still seems...there.

this was absolutely gorgeous. picked up quite nicely.

...i don't know why, but now i feel the need to cling to sam extra hard this evening *pout*

*gives you cookies*

[xnitelite.livejournal.com]

Such a lovely, hurty coda to Disinterment.

Because underneath it all, Dean was still Dean; untainted, unmarked inside and along his soul as he wasn't unmarked in body and mind. And that was what Sam needed to know -- had to know if only because he, himself, felt stained and damaged and battered inside as he physically wasn't.

Awwww, Sam.

Thank you for elaborating further about the meldy thing (my oh-so-technical term) between Sam and Dean. I'm simply enthralled by the connection they share. It's powerful and all-encompassing; I can see why it affects Sam so much and why he thinks it's so invasive.

I'll readily gobble up any further developments/insights about it. *g*

Thanks soooo much for sharing this. It's fantastic!