FIC LINK: The Fall From Grace in Ten Easy Steps (SPN: Adult, Death)

[maygra]

Title: The Fall From Grace in Ten Easy Steps (Ten connected drabbles)
Author: Maygra
Status: Complete
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Warnings/Ratings: Adult, Death.
Notes: Though I tend to write dark fic, I rarely (only once before) ever write death fic. Nor do I read them very often. That this presented itself to me is as suprising to me as to anyone.

Comments

[wrenlet.livejournal.com]

Oooooh... the best thing about reading something this good this early in the morning? I'll be thinking about it all day. The worst thing? Same :D

I think my favorites -- meaning, in this case, the ones that hurt the most -- are IV, V, and VII *whimper*. That Dean loves more, and knows it... and that he's not strong enough to let go of any part of Sam, even the broken parts. *thumps chest* Right here, gets me right here.

And at the end, I can't be sad for them. For John, yes, but the way IX reads to me, Sam and Dean died together and under the circumstances, I think that's the best either could wish for. (Well, and Missouri hearing the car makes me think they're still together, in some fashion, and this is where I admit I'm going to be pondering a Winchester afterlife all day.)

[maygra.livejournal.com]

thank you.

I almost wrote a coda called "Salvation". I'm still pondering. And yes, in this they go out together, there's no way to separate them.

I'm not honestly sure who loves more or if either of them do. Dean can't let go. Sam won't, at least that's how I see them. I think Dean would rather die than live without Sam. I think Sam would rather Dean live. Hard call to make.

[wrenlet.livejournal.com]

I'm not honestly sure who loves more or if either of them do.

I was influenced by V, but then that is strict Dean POV, so. :)

I think Sam would rather Dean live. Hard call to make.

It really is... Sam already knows what it is to be the person left behind, but parsing whether he'd want Dean in that position requires knowing the depths of Sam's feelings for Jess, and what Sam believes about the depth of Dean's feelings for him.

Basically, it's a great big tangle of pain and *cough* I'm kinda drawn to that :)

[wrenlet.livejournal.com]

... and I didn't even say that right, because it's not really about whether Dean loves Sam more than Sam loved Jess or... any weirdo permutations thereof, it's about how Sam feels about his life after Jess, and what Dean's life would be like without Sam. I suspected at first -- and I think Sam still does -- that John Winchester views his hunt as having a solitary goal, an end point, and after he's found whatever killed his wife, nothing after that matters. ("Home" and "Asylum" made me think harder about John's relationship to his sons and I'm not sure where my head's landed yet. Possibly I'm up in the air about this until we get new episodes.) But I don't think Sam feels that way; he's clearly on the warpath now, and I think he's realizing once it's over he can't exactly just go back to Stanford, but I think he still believes he'll have some kind of a life after all this is over.

So... (good lord, could this be more convulted?) the question is whether Sam feels Dean could live after his death, or just exist until he got whatever got Sam and then just stop?

(I need another icon with Sam. Phoo.)

[maygra.livejournal.com]

Okay. In general as regards to the series, yes, I think Sam absolutely thinks Dean could go on and I really think that if Sam died, Dean would go on, even more determined than before.

In regards to this bit of future-fic, no I don't think it's possible either of them would go on without the oterh. Physically, emotionally, or spiritually. Because this is a story about possession be it literal or just perceived an d I don't actually think the series is heading int hat direction exactly.